Complex Relationship

I went to the gym yesterday.
My relationship is complex.
To my wife, everything is great.
But with myself…
How do we handle that?
No idea…

On Monday morning this week, I went to the same place, Friskis & Svettis here in Täby, to join a class. Scary as f*ck. Can I really join them? Will I semi-die after these 55 minutes? Can it really be any good training? No idea…

I was smart, though, and selected a class called “Multifys Soft.” It’s slower, and there are zero prerequisites. Do what you can, what you want. Well actually, F&S says that always… But anyway, as you can see here, the other attendees were in some way like me.

I survived. I get the energy in this situation. I feel like me, before that hit I got. This scenario is heaven.

Unfortunately, it got me exhausted… So, instead of working after the class, I made it a vacation day.

It gets/takes energy…

Being at the gym, I realized / I think / I hope / I know — that I am now stronger, more mobile, more flexible, and more alert than ever since my stroke struck me three years and four months ago. I believe in me.

That’s why I love me.

I see very clearly what I can’t do. I can run on the treadmill, but only a few steps. I basically can’t do push-ups, because of several small/big issues. I have a lousy balance. I have no condition. None. I can’t do the simplest things I did with zero problems, 3 years, 4 months ago.

That’s why I hate myself.

I know, I know, I wrote roughly about the same thing, more than 2 years ago: Accept = Hate + Love. So, I guess nothing has changed since I started repeating myself? Maybe so…

Me myself and I have a complex relationship.

Some days are up, some are down. Some hours, I’m energized and happy, and some hours, I just want to sleep and forget everything.

Just embrace it? Probably that’s the best.

Can De La Soul and Miss Li make a mashup, please? And please call the song just “Jonas“. Okay?

One thought on “Complex Relationship

  1. Great post Jonas. I am reading it while I am in gym myself right now. You have become stronger both inside and outside ever 🙏

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